I originally started downloading Chihiro's fansubs of To Aru Kagaku no Railgun but they kind of fell behind and I didn't see any of them after ep 6. Ayako, on the other hand, was always current, so I picked them up as of ep 7.

Then I decided to go back and get all their earlier ones, so I've got Ayako's subs now of 1-11. Today I noticed that Chihiro had reached ep 10, and I managed to find their versions of eps 7-9, so I've got them up to their leading edge, which is one behind.

When I watched Ayako's version of ep 1 I noticed several places where their translations were considerably different, and it occurred to me that it might make an interesting post to compare the two. So here goes, below the fold.

00:24 Ayako: This city never fails to keep me entertained.
    Chihiro: Really, you never do get bored in this city.

I heard the word taikutsu in there, which means "bored". And I think that Chihiro's translation does a better job of conveying Mikoto's annoyance.

02:33 Ayako: We can't have you picking fights like this.
    Chihiro: It's troublesome when you interfere as you please.

Someone is taking serious liberties with this line, but I can't tell who.

05:37 Ayako: She has so much destructive power that they need to use the pool water as a shock absorbant.
    Chihiro: Her power is so destructive that it can't even be measured without using the water as a dampener.

I don't know who is more accurate, but Chihiro's line feels more natural. It delivers better.

06:50 Ayako: Though... these breasts are a bit too small to stand out on their own.
    Chihiro: this chest, lacking a bit of the ineffable qualities of youth, may be too modest for that.

06:55 Ayako: Your modesty is your sin, Onee-sama...
    Chihiro: Ah, but this modesty is what makes Onee-sama so sinfully voluptuous.

I can't really tell, but I think Chihiro's translator is taking liberties here. But he's doing it to make the situation more funny, and I think it works. I prefer Chihiro's version of this one.

07:53 Ayako: You're so mean...
    Chihiro: That was mean...

Uiharu says hidoi desu yo. Both translations are permissible since the subject is missing from that sentence, but considering Uiharu's character, I think Chihiro's translation is more in-character. Uiharu isn't the kind of girl who would directly accuse another of something even if it was true.

08:24 Ayako: Umm, I'm not really sure if that's the right method of encouragement, but anyway...
    Chihiro: Err... there's a lot in that teacher's reasoning that's just begging for a quip,

I suspect what's going on here is that what Saten really said was tough to translate, and they both winged it.

09:36 Ayako: Isn't she just another one of those whores who look down on everyone else and think their own ability is all that?
    Chihiro: No doubt she's one of those people who look down on others because of their abilities.

I don't think Saten is the kind to use language that rough. I have to vote for Chihiro this time, absent specific evidence about what Saten really said.

10:37 Ayako: Now, I know you find the actions of your fangirls disgusting, but Uihara is a nice, polite girl.
    Chihiro: I'm well aware of the fact that you care little for the insolence of your followers, but Uihara's a girl who knows her place.

And yet again. Ayako's version is rougher than Chihiro's, and I can't see Kuroko saying something quite that frank. Circumlocution is more in-character. Mikoto isn't an ojou-sama, but Kuroko is one. She uses watakushi, for instance. Ladies like that don't use words that strong.

11:07 Ayako: Part 1: Go to a restaurant to strengthen our friendship.
    Chihiro: Part one: Deepen our relationship at a family restaurant.

Ayako's translator seems to have missed the joke. This isn't about "friendship", it's about Kuroko trying to seduce Mikoto.

11:09 Ayako: Part 2: Go to the lingerie shop (to buy sexy underwear).
    Chihiro: Part two: Go to a lingerie store (to buy 'get-lucky' underwear).

And here, too. I have no idea what the original Japanese was, but Chihiro's version of this, the phrase "get-lucky underwear", always makes me laugh. Ayako's version just sits there.

11:14 Ayako: Part 4: Delete Uiharu
    Chihiro: Part four: Get rid of Uiharu.

What she really said was Uiharu kujo. Literally that means "extermination, expulsion, destruction" so Ayako has translated it accurately. But Chihiro's line works better. Kuroko doesn't mean "kill her"; she's talking about dumping her to get her out of the way of the upcoming seduction attempt. Ayako isn't making any attempt to support the humor in the scene.

This is probably a good point to describe the main difference I see: Ayako sounds like a translation. Chihiro sounds like a script. By which I mean that Chihiro is writing the English the way that someone would write it if they were trying to make the show good in the other language. Ayako is translating the dialog literally, without any nuance or cultural translation, and isn't making any attempt to make the dialog fit the characters or the scene or the intentions of the original writers.

11:20 Ayako: So, in other words, you're going to take advantage of your nice, polite friend in order to live out your sick fantasies.
    Chihiro: In other words, you intend to take advantage of your innocent friend in order to realize your own perverted fantasies?

Ayako continues to miss the point. The word translated here as "sick" or "perverted" is hentai and Chihiro's "perverted" not only is more accurate, it's funnier.

16:28 Ayako: Uiharu, report to the Antiskills and see if we've suffered any casualties.
    Chihiro: Uiharu! Contact Anti-Skill and check for any casualties!

Kuroko is snapping out orders in an action situation. Ayako's translation is too wordy; it feels like conversation, not like crisp orders. It may be accurate but it isn't what someone would really say in a situation like that.

19:10 Ayako: Looks like things just got personal.
    Chihiro: This just got personal.

Ayako's translation comes across as too casual. Mikoto has blood in her eye, and Chihiro's translation properly conveys more menace. Mikoto is announcing her intention to kick butt.

19:21 Ayako: Judgment has this Teleporter with a really nasty reputation. You're done for if she catches you. She'll shred your body and your soul to pieces.
    Chihiro: There's this malevolent Teleporter in Judgement who'll tear apart the body and soul of anyone she catches!

I have a feeling that Ayako's translation is more accurate on a microscopic level, but it feels stilted. Chihiro's line is one I can imagine someone saying.

20:11 Ayako: Tokiwadai middle school's pride. Our invincible Electric Princess.
    Chihiro: the pride of Tokiwadai Middle School, the peerless Electric Princess!

The key word in this one is muteki which can be translated as "invincible" or as "unrivaled". "Peerless" is another good translation of the second meaning, and I think Chihiro made the better choice. Kuroko's pride in her friend notwithstanding, Mikoto is not invincible and Kuroko isn't one to engage in that kind of hyperbole.

Obviously I prefer Chihiro's translation. Both translators seem technically competent, but Chihiro's translator is a better writer. So I'm glad Chihiro didn't drop the show.

Posted by: Steven Den Beste in General Anime at 09:24 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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