October 21, 2014

Similes

Just rewatched the GuP OVA, and reflected on the character Pepperoni. The character page for her on TVTropes says, "Not the sharpest tool in Anzio's shed."

And I got to thinking about other humorous ways of saying "She's not too smart." And... I could only think of one: "Not the brightest bulb on the tree."

Surely there must be more! Help me out here!

(I'm looking for things that suggest she isn't very smart, not things that suggest that she may be nuts. So "Not playing with a full deck" or "Rowing with only one oar in the water" don't qualify.)

Posted by: Steven Den Beste in General Anime at 10:37 AM | Comments (13) | Add Comment
Post contains 102 words, total size 1 kb.

1 "Not running on all four cylinders"?

Posted by: Avatar_exADV at October 21, 2014 12:43 PM (zJsIy)

2 "Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top."

Posted by: RickC at October 21, 2014 01:25 PM (0a7VZ)

3 A few useful lines, courtesy of A.M. Yankovic:
I'm not the brightest crayon in the box
I'm dumber than a bag of rocks
I may not be the sharpest hunk of cheese
I got a negative number on my SATs
Got too much chlorine in my gene pool
A few peas short of a casserole
A few buttons missing on my remote control
A few fries short of a happy meal
I couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel
I'm not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree
I'm dumber than a box of hair
I'm a taco short of a combo plate
I'm about as sharp as a bowling ball
The room temperature's higher than my IQ
I'm not the quickest tractor on the farm

Posted by: Don at October 21, 2014 02:27 PM (Rr4UF)

4 I have heard (or used)...

Not the sharpest {knife,pencil} in the drawer.  

Inane combinations of them (not the sharpest bulb on the tree.)

The lights are on, but nobody's home.

(A Foghorn Leghorn quote search would probably find a few more.  He was always calling the chickenhawk and the dog stupid.  ...did the chickenhawk and dog have names?)

Posted by: Mikeski at October 21, 2014 04:39 PM (luDkn)

5 Someone has a collection. I've heard a few of these in the wild; others are third-rate attempts to riff on the common pattern.

-j

Posted by: J Greely at October 21, 2014 04:43 PM (fpXGN)

6

The chickenhawk was named Henery Hawk.

The dog was Barnyard Dawg.

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at October 21, 2014 05:21 PM (+rSRq)

7 I would post something, but I'm often distracted by the interesting pictures at the top of the page.

Maybe there's a phrase for that.

Posted by: Mark A. Flacy at October 21, 2014 06:17 PM (vEp0w)

8 I'm glad someone notices. I've put a lot of work into it.

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at October 21, 2014 08:34 PM (+rSRq)

9 Sometimes I just leave it up while I'm working. It's definitely appreciated.

Posted by: Avatar_exADV at October 21, 2014 10:25 PM (zJsIy)

10 (I think the dog's name was Ralph)
"Nice girl, but about as sharp as a sack of wet mush."  (best said with the full Foghorn accent)

Posted by: Douglas Oosting at October 23, 2014 10:42 AM (sdWdc)

11 For a long time, my go-to has been "dumb as a box of hair."   

Posted by: Wonderduck at October 23, 2014 12:16 PM (jGQR+)

12

"I think the dog's name was Ralph"

Ralph was actually the wolf that battled the sheepdog.

Posted by: RickC at October 23, 2014 03:26 PM (0a7VZ)

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at October 23, 2014 03:49 PM (+rSRq)

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